||[Sep. 2nd, 2009|10:32 am]
GLBT Aspies and other non-socialites
|||||"If It Kills Me" Jason Mraz||]|
My name is Josh and I am a twenty-five year old gay male. I recently started a livejournal account again so that I could track my attempt at over coming and getting help with my "Social Anxiety Disorder". It is something I've had trouble with all my life and I'm not sure what it will take to help me at least manage it in a way that allows me to function in society but here goes to trying!
All my life I've had trouble with feeling 'normal' even now with jobs (which I can't seem to hold down) I find myself sick to my tummy hours before it is even time for me to go in. Most of these jobs have all been where I directly have to deal with people. Retail and or Security being the major ones. I have a hard time being social or voicing my thoughts in a way where I feel it actually gets respected. A good example is recently with a job I had I couldn't bring myself to answer the phone out of fear that I wouldn't know what to say or how to assist the person calling.
As side notes I have a horrible time with feeling like I have to insure other people are happy. If there is even the slightest chance that I might upset someone or I know I have to be around someone that is upset it instantly throws me off and into a panic.
I love things about science and nature, especially Physics and Biology. I joined this community because like many of you I have so few friends and when you are so introverted by nature, it is hard to find them. If anyone would like to talk sometime I'd be more than happy to casually chat. Who knows maybe we can help each other.
Well that is about it!